I give up

I officially give up on ttc it's way to much stress. I'm 21 and my DH is 44 we have been TTC for a year now. All I think about is having a baby it's driving me crazy. Every month I think this is it for me and every month AF arrives and it's back to square one. Two of my best friends are expecting a baby and that's all they talk about" how they weren't even trying" or "they are tired of being pregnant" it drives me nuts, I'm happy for them and they want me to come to there baby showers but I just don't think I can. Sorry for the pitty party  but I feel a little better getting it all out. But for now I give up on TTC if it happens it happens I'm putting it in gods hands no more stressing!