My due date was 8/16. For the last couple weeks I had been getting lots of scattered contractions, so when I went for my 40 week check on Friday 8/16 I thought I would be dilated.. nope. Not at all. So we scheduled my induction for the following week on Tuesday night 8/20 into Wednesday 8/21. I was so badly hoping I’d go into labor on my own, but I didn’t. We get to the hospital Tuesday night and they check me. Nothing. So they inserted the cervidil into my cervix in hopes of getting me to dilate. 12 hours later I’m having contractions that started at 7-10 minutes and were every 4 minutes by the time the doctor on call checked me. When he checked me, I was only dilated 2cm. As he checks me he tells me he is pretty confident that my delivery will end up in c section because baby is too big to fit through my pelvis. So after contemplating with my fiancé, we decided to go with the c section. The doctor basically told me if I wanted to continue with the induction, it could and would most likely be very long and painful and would likely end up in a c section anyway. I don’t know about you, but I definitely didn’t want to be in labor for hours and hours and hours to be told I needed a cesarean anyway. We also felt that a c section would be safer for our baby, as I was too afraid of her getting stuck in my pelvis and all the risks that go along with that.

My c section was the scariest thing I think I’ve ever done in my life. I’ve never had a surgery aside from my wisdom teeth. They brought me back to prep me and I was shaking so hard from anxiety. I was so afraid I was going to panic at my whole body being numb. Once I was on the table they let my fiancé come in, and once he was there I was completely okay. They started my procedure and everyone in the room was just so happy and talking about their days. My fiancé held my hand as laid there waiting to hear my baby girl cry. Next thing we know we heard a loud “POP” and the sound of liquid everywhere. My water sounded like it exploded when they broke it. Next thing I know they say she’s out and someone says “time of delivery 11:38am.” They held her up over the curtain so I could see her and her eyes were open and she was crying. I immediately had tears running down my face. As they worked to clean me up my fiancé was over at the table with two of the ladies cleaning off our baby and getting her height and weight and foot prints. He held her up to my face and she had her cheek against mine and I just couldn’t stop crying. I am glad we decided to go with the c section as far as our baby’s safety because our girl ended up being 8lbs 10oz and 20.5in long! That may not seem like a big baby to others, but I guess for my pelvis that is. The doctor said it was a smart choice.

So, I had a really hard time recovering after surgery. I guess from all the drugs. I was vomiting, in pain and couldn’t hold my baby until I got it together. About two hours after she was born is when I got to hold her for the first time. The pain of the incision I think is the worst part, and even then I don’t think it hurts any worse than the pain of having contractions. Now here’s to hoping my milk will come in any day now because my nipples are raw and can’t take anymore cluster feeding... I caved and gave her formula last night so my nipples could have a break and I SOBBED because I feel like a failure for giving her formula. I feel better knowing she’s not hungry, my nipples needed a break tonight and then I’m going to continue on my breast feeding journey.

Anyway, sorry my story wasn’t that eventful but thank you for reading it anyway. Here’s a some pictures of my beautiful baby girl:

Sydney Lynn Gram*******

08/21/2019 11:38AM

8lbs 10oz 20.5in