I can’t believe I’m 34 weeks now...

🌹N

Wow, I’m going to be a mom for the first time this October. It’s so crazy how August is about to end in a few days and my baby shower is coming soon, too. Last October 2018, I miscarried at 12 weeks on the Halloween weekend, it was truly awful and devastating. During that time, I told my boyfriend that I was NOT ready to try for a baby yet due to this trauma and I couldn’t stand the memories of my miscarriage so I needed the time to heal. Thank God my boyfriend was so sweet enough to agree with me.

Until last Jan, it seems like God had a different plan for us! Instead of waiting, I was blessed with another baby. Of course, we were genuinely shocked like what?! I felt like my baby fought his way to be with me for some reasons. And now I’m getting close and closer to my due date. I admit I’m beyond nervous and scared about how to be a good mom to my son. We work full times, we rent an apartment and we are in a good place but yet I’m still so nervous/scared/anxious so is my boyfriend. We talk a lot about how we feel about this but at the end of the day, we always say we got this!!! Lol

I feel like it’s a dream but no, it is not and my old chapter of young childfree woman is about to end. I think I’ll miss the old Nicole yet I’m excited for a new chapter of the motherhood ❤️ I’m more than looking forward to meet the mini us 💕

The old me, childfree, free spirit woman that always loved to travel and completed so many goals. ^^

Taken in July but still, I’m about to be a mom in less than two months! It feels so super weird! What kind of a mother am I gonna be?! How can I still be me and be a mom all in one?

Does anyone (FTM) feels the same way?