I’m too a point where I don’t want to marry the father of my children. I want to be with him but I don’t want to marry him at least not anymore.

I don’t know what I would tell my children if they ever ask why my last name is different than theirs or their dads.

I just don’t see the point in being married not anymore at least I’ve already not proudly been through marriage before. I don’t want to go through a divorce again if it ever gets to that point. The only reason why I ever see marrying him if for legal reasons if shit hits the fan.

I’m just so unsure I don’t know what to think or feel anymore.

Update:

Never once said I wasn’t committed. I only ever brought up divorce because he threatens to leave me every time there’s a bump in the relationship. It’s become exhausting to the point where marrying him would be a hassle.

Yes at one point I did want to marry him but there’s been things he has done that I chose to forgive him for but have changed my mind about the person he is and marrying him