I almost died from a postpartum hemorrhage

Michelle • Baby 💗 born 6/11/17 & 💗 born 8/27/19

I am 9 days PP. I had a normal pregnancy, normal vaginal delivery. I was healing just fine. Two days ago I started bleeding uncontrollably. To the point I lost consciousness for over 10 mins and my BP dropped to 50/30. Due to the quick acting of my husband.. the ambulance arrived just in time. My vision was completely gone.. I could hear what was going on but couldn’t respond. I could feel myself trying to scream for help but nothing would come out. It was the most terrifying moment in my life. They couldn’t find a vein.. I was poked over 25 times, including several times in my neck. They finally got enough blood to test my levels. I was rushed into emergency surgery to stop the bleeding. I am at home recovering with my newborn and 2 year old. I am severely traumatized and emotional. I’m so afraid this will push me into postpartum depression during this already fragile time after having a baby. Has anyone else had this happen to them?! My doctor said it’s very rare and unsure why it happened. I didn’t know how close I was to dying until after it all happened... 🙁