I dont know anymore

I was fine already and hit me again and again! Everytime I remember him fucking that bitch I'm just soooooo fucking mad!!! I'm so done with my life I dont know what to do anymore. Leave him? I can't because I'm too fucking stupid for loving my husband I just wish I didn't marry that fucking cheater! Why I cant leave? I'm fucking stupid bitch! I I'm so mad to myself for believing him not doing it again and marry him instead lol I'm so stupid right? Yeah fuck my fucking life!