so i’m almost 17, 5’2” and 160 pounds

my brother is almost 19, 5’10” and 168 all muscle

my sister is almost 14, 4’10” and not even 100 pounds.

so it’s clear i’m the fat child. my dad always yells at me for being lazy (literally cuz i don’t want to run 2 miles straight) and my mom tells my sister that i’m overweight and need to exercise, so that made me feel absolutely

i have my confirmation saturday and a school dance the following week so my mom and i went dress shopping today. well, my mom took me to one of those store for heavier women where the smallest size is a 14. so that also just made me feel GREAT about myself.

so i wore this black dress last year when i was 165 pounds:

so since i lost 5 pounds i tried it on again and i looked SO much better. so i went to show my mom

she didn’t think so

she pointed out every place fat was coming out of. so i just feel great about myself right now since i can’t learn to love my body the way it is cuz i need to change. i lost 3 pounds last week and looked at myself in the mirror and felt great about myself and happy, but i’m not anymore because of this. love my life.

oh and i find this cute sweater dress to wear to a play i’m going to in december and tried it on and loved it. my mom asked if it came in a bigger size and im like yea it does but i want this one so i can lose weight and fit in it (in reality i thought it looked good as is)

anywho

not looking for compliments or reassurance, just needed to let it all out so i can hopefully stop crying before my mom sees✌️