Long ass birth story- part 3/5

6pm comes around.... no midwife.... no diomorphine, both my mum and SO are alittle agitated, I'm still in alot of pain and we had no idea what was happening... 7pm comes around.... I'm fairly distressed at this point back to squeezing back pain, my SO feeling helpless heads out the door and goes searching for a midwife, 5 minutes later he re-appears and says shes coming down soon, I tell him to sit down and get something out the bag to eat and drink, that I'm okay and they're just busy, he explains that he feels useless and he doesn't like seeing me in pain when he can't do anything.... the sappy bugger

The midwife rocks in (one I've not had before) and starts to explain that I won't be induced because she stopped it? Saying "they told me they were going to induced you but I said oh no you're not doing that to a first time mum, I'm going to get you that diomorphine and check your progression" that check was painful!

"Good news is your cervix is now fully thinned" she speeled off something else and I got my diomorphine.... the rest is alittle blurry / not as organised as I remember so some bits may overlap:

I believe it was around 9 PM I got told that they were going to take me down and my induction was back on, my mum was extremely relieved, we started packing the bags back up, I go to get out of the bed and my SO goes "oh no, they moved the other lass down in the bed they can move you" (by this point we were both completely and utterly shattered, he was sick of seeing me in pain, worried due to my waters breaking and annoyed midwives kept telling us to keep an eye on it yet brushing it off whenever it was mentioned back to them not to mention I was still alittle out of it also)

Another midwife Sarah comes in, explains shes the one that's going to be doing my induction, I asked if she wanted me to get up to which I got a pretty -you're kidding right?- face and a "Yep, I'm sure you're fine to walk arent you..come on" and a half arsed smile, so I woddled my arse down to the room and asked about the epidural

I asked about the epidural 3 times, Sarah (kept brushing it off) she explained about how I'll be on a drip to speed things up "as my waters have been broken for longer than 24 hours and I've been in a slow labour and I haven't progressed" my mum turned around and asked what would happen if I didn't progress any better to prompt Sarah about the positibilty of an emergency C section as the slow labour would be causing distress to the LO.

She finally goes and gets the anesthesiologist, he comes in talking rather fast, explaining how it's not guaranteed, I could have back ache, when he administrating it I need to sit perfectly still and also guide him, at this point all I could do was shut down and deal - beauty of autism is you reach an over stimulation and literally just shut down, I nodded, sat on the edge of the bed, curved my spine and grabbed a hold of my SO's hands, the first time he did it a pop sensation happened and I jumped because he didn't mention he was doing it then, he then proceeded to tell me off "See! That! That right there you cant do that! You do that and I'll have to start all over again and you don't want that!"....I was pretty done at this point and couldn't be bothered pointing out his attitude, my mum was shocked but didnt say anything... you dont really wanna piss off the guy sticking a needle in your daughters back...i apologised and said i didn't expect it and that he didn't let me know..then just shut down again, he proceeded with the epidural and asked where i felt it i remember saying "right, centre, centre" he finished up and again said "now theres no guarantee, there's no guarantee I did what I could, I've set the time for the top up" (turned to Sarah) "shes on low dosage for now and the timer has been set so you can just leave that for the time being" and then leaves.

I'm still pretty shut down at this point, I get back in the bed, sat upright asking for it to be put up more (could not stand being laid back!) Sarah only put it so far up explaining that I needed to be on a slant so she could check me easier, I was miserable not going to lie, I was extremely uncomfortable. She sets off my drip and starts monitoring me, theres me, my mum, my SO and Sarah in the room and this is where it all kind of went to shit......