Will there ever be a time I don't still ache for what I've lost...its nearly been a year...im 6 months along with a perfectly healthy rainbow baby girl now...and I still wake up in the night crying for the baby we've lost...i never knew their gender, I never got to feel them move inside me...yet I constantly think about them...my due date for them has come and gone...the world has kept going...ive been told "okay, this is getting ridiculous, it's time to move on" but how do you move on from something you were forced to go through...i didn't want to lose that baby...they were taken from me...How am I supposed to let that go...somedays are okay, I can function and go about my day, thankful that I'm actually getting to buy baby stuff and get ready for our daughter...but other days I'm just trying to get through the day as fast as possible so I can get back to bed and dream about my 1st baby again...i know it's selfish but sometimes I wish I could just move on and forget...the last year has been the hardest of my life and I'm just ready for the new years...so we can focus on this baby...this new house...our new life...