Am I fully alone?

I hate holidays. I hate that everyone expects you to spend all of your time with them. I hate that everyone expects presents and low key feel insulted when they don’t get anything. I have social anxiety to the point I go weeks and months without seeing other people aside from my husband and kids. I’m also bi polar. Family get togethers really take a lot out of me. I feel awkward, uncomfortable and paranoid the entire time. I literally can’t wait to go home. This year I have the sniffles and made it seem way worse just to get out of going. I sent my family and am enjoying an empty house. I wanted to start our own family traditions of dinner and stuff with my family but my husband thinks it’s important to go all over the county seeing (his) family. My family moved away and honestly it’s nice not having that stress to spend time with them too. Am I just a horrible person?