So I have this guy BEST friend and we have always been going thru issues because technically in our religious community boys and girls aren’t allowed to be close friends.

But we still remained close just behind the scenes over the phone

A month ago my parents found out and got really upset and took my phone away for a bit but I had no regret or shame because he was worth it

So we had to split for a month which was really hard for me. Then I heard from my friends that he was going through a rough time and took another risk of talking to him again. We kept it a secret again bc we knew my parents wouldn’t allow it even if I was honest. Once again, they found out but I still just couldn’t leave the relationship out of personal desire.

Right now, we are having problems between the 2 of us. I feel like at certain points he is bland and doesn’t deserve my loyalty but at other times he is so sweet (literally said “out of 7.7 billion people in the word she a 1 out of 1”) but I’m worried if that’s sweet talk bc sometimes our convos get flirtatious or if he’s being serious (he tells me he’s being serious but I still have a little doubt)

He says he cares about me and that I’m worth it to him but it’s hard to fully believe because he just isn’t that emotional. But I want to be fought for not having to always go after him. And I jus always tend to think that he wouldn’t put as much effort as I would. And to be clear he has acknowledged I am stronger than him mentally and emotionally

Recently We’ve been kinda gettin into little fights because of how I tell him I’m feeling and how we are both confused by each other and how I feel he doesn’t give a crap about me. Today he also added that “All my friends were like that’s not the move” [thats not the move basically means that it’s not a good idea] and he told me “I made the decision of staying and trying to comprehend what you’re saying”

So I just don’t know what to do 🤷🏽‍♀️ because I’ve tried telling him I’m confused bc he won’t express his feelings to me but it starts a mini offensive showdown if you know what I mean 😂

Any advice please would be amazing ❤️