He barely takes care of our 16- almost 17 month old daughter. He does amazing with providing for her but he’s awful when it comes to bonding & caring for her.

I gave him a ultimatum back in August but really didn’t put it into affect until the end of September. But the ultimatum was that he’s supposed to take care of her on days that he isn’t working (so weekends and holidays) so that I can have a break to do whatever and if he has to be told to do what he’s supposed to or completely neglects the deal, I’ll write it down in my notes. If he hasn’t fixed this issue by January 1st, I’m leaving. Well, so far, he hasn’t proven shit.

He swears that I’m being unfair because he works. He has the mindset of a man in 1900s. He thinks women are supposed to do all the housework and raise babies while he gets treated like a king. He’s horribly lazy, I don’t mind cleaning but he says “you’re supposed to pick up after me, that’s YOUR job” when I get mad at him for throwing all his trash on the floor. Even as bad as shoving it in between the walls & bed. When we had an actual bed headboards, when we decided to get rid of it, there was diapers and trash everywhere underneath. Guess who had to clean it while he stood there telling me what I needed to do.

Anyways, last night, we celebrated thanksgiving at my sisters. We celebrated with his family on Thursday, his family isn’t allowed to drink in his grandmas house because she’s a Christian. My family is laid back so there was alcohol. The one freaking time I get to get drunk, and he ruined it for me because he couldn’t let me have one night. He got high and so drunk that he spent almost all night puking. He does this every time, I just wanted this one night to get loose and couldn’t because he always neglects his responsibility. He came up to me and started rambling on about being too messed up to take care of her, I told him that it’s his own fault and I don’t care since he knew that he’s supposed to be the one to care for our daughter. He tried to be all sweet and loving and because I was so mad that I couldn’t have one night to do what I wanted, I didn’t even care. I let him smoke weed and drink whenever he wants because he’s a grown man and I try to let him have a life, but it’s not fair that I can’t even get one night to have fun.

Same with having opposite gender friends. He has a lot of female friends and he talks to them almost every day. One even invited him to her thanksgiving. These girls have only known him since he’s had this job (so like 4 years). But I have one male friend (whom I’ve been best friends with since 12 years old). He gets jealous and swears I’m cheating on him with the guy because I shouldn’t be happy to have a guy friend. I can’t even post a picture on Snapchat without him on some bs about the guy. I told the guy and we just joked about it. This guy is my best friend, he actually compliments me (my boyfriend doesn’t so it’s nice to hear it) and I can joke with him (which I can’t with my boyfriend because he takes things too far so it’s nice to be able to joke and not worry about him saying something personal). My boyfriend got mad because I told the guy, he said “of course he’s gonna say y’all are just friends, you have a boyfriend but I bet he wishes it were him”. Literally my one guy best friend compared to his 30something girl best friends. I can’t tell if it’s me or the guy whom he doesn’t trust because I feel like it’s me just by how my boyfriend talks.

My boyfriend doesn’t say I’m pretty or anything because he’s too busy talking about how cute he is. He’s too busy asking me a million times a day is he looks good, I don’t even answer him anymore because it’s annoying.

He also makes it seem like a relationship is built on sex. If I don’t feel like having sex with him (which I haven’t been in the mood since the birth of our daughter) he says “what’s the point in being in a relationship if I can’t have sex when I want”. He claims the sex is the glue that holds a relationship together, but if he understood that it’s his own fault why I just ain’t interested in sex anymore. There’s so many reasons why I just don’t wanna have sex with him.

You know how they say the day he loves you most, you won’t love him anymore? Well that’s getting true. Every day, I love him less and less.

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