I know this is kinda long but I really need opinions. Please

So my bf and I broke up 2 months ago. The week we broke up. Monday I wanted to break up but I couldn’t because even though things were going bad I didn’t want to lose him. He asked me to try again. I said okay. Three days later he broke up with me. I tried to be friends but I couldn’t. Now in school I’m sad, crying because I lost my best friend. The person who I believed was for me.

I believed all his lies. Saying I’m never going to break up with you. I would get depressed if we broke up. I would want to fix things but never break up. The only way we would break up is if u cheated or broke up with me.

I even asked him to try again and he told me it was too late. I asked a week later because it was hard for me to face him

I felt stupid for believing everything he told me. Anyways my cousin and him still talk. He told my cousin I broke up with him. We were in afterschool and I was sitting at one table and they were at another. He told my cousin I’m sad because I broke up with him. He told my cousin he tried to get back with me but I said no. When my cousin told me this I started crying. I’m still hurt over the break up. And he is literally making me look stupid. I told my cousin that’s definitely a lie and I told him the truth. Now he understood why I was so sad about the break up.

Now I feel big stupid. Because we are apart of the same friend group. So if he told my cousin that and it could be he is telling my friends that also. Now they could be thinking, why is she crying if she broke up with him. Is trying to get attention? Like I feel so stupid because the past two months have been stressful. With college and money wise. Not only that but I didn’t want to do anything for awhile. I felt so empty and sad after we broke up. Like all I wanted to do was stay in bed and cry. I’ve had a panic attack because of how stress I have been. And I usually do know how to control my emotions but after the break up, I just didn’t care about anything anymore. Like I noticed the changes and I’m trying to better myself.

That’s besides the point am I overthinking everything. Like should I just ask him why he is lying or just leave it alone?