Not only did it seem like they shoved the needles in crazy far/deep but seeing my daughter scream in such horrific pain and feel like I did something terrible or let somebody hurt her made me feel like the worst mom ever. I have friends that didn’t vaccinate but am so scared of losing my daughter to terrible diseases that I felt it was a necessary evil. She took her bottle of breastmilk right after and passed out for the 1.5 hour drive home (we live in a rural town and have to go to the city for pediatric care). She seemed a little fussy when we got home but ate and fell back asleep for an hour... but then started screaming like she did when she got the shots and wouldn’t stop. I’m of course in tears and got her skin to skin while my fiancé measured Tylenol and warmed a bottle. She only calmed down enough to pass out for twenty minutes and by then it was two hours since she had eaten and started fussing. I got her to calm enough and gave her to her dad for a bottle so I could try and take an hour nap (I’d been awake 24 hours and wasn’t safe to hold her in the recliner nodding off myself while she slept). I woke up a couple hours later surprised but happy she was finally resting and still asleep after her last bottle.

I’m holding her now while her dad sleeps but feel like I’m scared sh*tless of her waking up and feeling her scream and cry in pain and know it was from a decision I made. Anyone else feel like they have PTSD from their vaccination experience? My heart is broken and I’m beside myself at the moment but trying to stay calm and as positive as possible...knowing I protected her in the long run 😢♥️

Any personal stories and encouragement are really appreciated! 🤗

Ps. I know ptsd sounds dramatic but I First battled it years ago after a domestic abuse nightmare I was finally able to run from. I was almost at the point where I felt I shouldn’t pick her up from her dad bc she was sleeping still and I’m terrified of her waking up and seeing her in agony. Also feel like I can’t be alone with her today bc I don’t want to set her down when I need to pee or eat or pump and risk her crying again ...