I dont understand what to feel. My husband and I arent sexual often. I was always in the mood the first few years and was always the one instigating then slowly stopped. Yet it didnt make him want me or instigate at all. Then I would catch him playing with himself. Which is fine I really dont care about that. The part that bothered me was there was nights he would be laying next to me in bed and I would wake up to him doing it....sometimes I would try and ignore. Or pretend to stir in my sleep, even just got up to pee. When I would come back in the room he would be laying there all innocent and say ohh you okay?..😒😒... I've talked to him about wanting him to instigate more and he says he loves having sex with me but he just isnt in the mood like that.. yet nights he goes to bed early I'll catch him playing with himself. Or even walk by the bathroom and see tucking away his hard dick.. like wtf if I'm not home then do as you please...but if I'm home then take that energy off on me!! Its so frustrating to see him doing this at least once a day.. like this morning I woke him up for work and sat on the bed with him for a couple minutes. I walked out of the room and wasnt even 10ft away from the open door. I was playing with the dog for legit 2 minutes doing a little training. Again I'm right outside the OPEN door. And I go back into the bedroom and see him jacking off....I was like you know I could have helped with that you know...he seriously said uhhh uhh you were playing with the dog and I uh didnt get hard until you walked away....I just rolled my eyes and had sex cause I was in the mood already. But did I enjoy it? Kinda? Theres no passion anymore. He tells me how much he wants a family and tells me he hates finding out I get my period each month because it means I'm not pregnant...I've explained to him that there needs to be alot less stress in our lifes more then likely before I get pregnant. Hes started to except that. But I recently said to him. You gotta have sex to get pregnant. We can't have sex maybe 2 times a month and expect a baby to be made. But I really just dont feel wanted. And I know I'm beautiful. I know he thinks I'm beautiful and is happy to have me as his...yet he never touches me sexually. And even so he doesnt ever just take some time for my pleasure anymore. I gotta do all the work and 99% of the time I ride on top of him. I'm just so bored and feel so unwanted. I just need comfort on how to go about this. 😒😒😔😔😔