So I honestly don’t want anyone but my husband at the hospital at all. I’ve already told our parents, siblings and grandparents that they won’t be invited into the room until at the very least 2 hours after the baby is born.

Now with my husbands family it’s not a big deal. He doesn’t have much extended family and the majority of what he has lives hours away. So it’s fine with them that when the baby is born we only want a select few to be at the hospital.

Unfortunately, my extended family is pretty big and very close. Everyone shows up to the hospital while you’re in labor regardless of how long and everyone sees the baby the day of birth.

My husband and I talked and then I messaged my mom and grandma. It said “The day that he’s born after a few hours I’m fine with you guys, grandparents, MIL,FIL, and siblings taking turns coming in. Since the rooms are so small i don’t think id be comfortable with all 9 of you coming in at the same time. Other than you guys I’d rather not have any other visitors until the next day because I don’t handle pin and feeling sick well and I’d rather just not have to talk to too many people the day I have the baby”.

My husband sent something similar to his mom and she said ok sounds good. Neither my mom or grandma have even answered me. I’m not sure if they’re upset about it or what. Any time I do something that strays from what they think I should do I’m “being selfish”.

For example, I stay away from my stepdad and his family. My mom wanted to invite her SIL to my shower and I said I’d rather not have her there. In response I’m “being unforgiving and selfish and need to learn how to forgive”. I explained that forgiving people and continuing to have them in your life are two separate things. But guess who ended up at my baby shower just because i felt guilty for upsetting my mom 🙄

So I’m just freaking out that theyre upset that im straying from what our family normally does when people have kids.