Heartbroken

Me and my husband found out November 7 that we was pregnant and expecting a new addiction to our family. On December 12 we found out that we was 7 weeks pregnant with twins. I got bad sick were I was throwing up everything food and liquids. On dec 20 I woke up at 5 am throwing up small amount of blood. Before 9 I had already threw up 7 more times each time hurting more and making me light headed and still had small amount of blood coming up. I went to the er they said I was fine gave me medicine to keep food and liquid down. Told me the babies were fine because I wasnt bleeding. On jan 9 we went to go see the babies heart beat. Suppose to be 12 weeks. Me my husband and my 5 year old was watching the screen. Looking at the babies. Baby A was laying at the bottom of my uterus not moving and baby B was just laying there still attached. But neither one had a heartbeat. They both measured out at 9 weeks and 4 days. Because no one checked the babies when I went to the er I went 2 weeks not knowing that my babies were dead inside me. I had to go jan 13 to deliver the twins in a D&C not knowing if there boys or girls. My son doesnt understand that his baby siblings wasnt coming anymore and all everyone keeps telling me is you can try again. I'm 25 I turn 26 in 10 days i have a 5 year old my husband will be 29 this year. I have 2 sister in law who are pregnant, my boss is pregnant, they dont understand how hard it is to watch them go through the things I wont get to do. It took 4 years to get the twins and they were a miracle. I dont know if I can take the risk of going through this again. I love my son I wish he had a sibling or siblings but watching people I'm close to not even trying or wanting to be pregnant hurts while I'm over here trying and losing what matter most hurts me.