Am I overreacting?

Question

My fiance and I got in a "fight" where I expressed that I was unhappy not being on the deed to our house due to a clerical error, that I would like for us to fix it because it didnt really feel like our house if it was legally just his house. Immediately after my saying that he shot out of bed, grabbed our alarm clock and threw it into the ground. Then screamed incoherent words and sat there with his head in hands while I cowered in the corner of the bed very stunned, a little afraid, and very much crying. He groaned and laid back in bed, declaring the conversation over. This isnt the first time he has had a similar explosive reaction during a discussion. He always says it doesnt mean anything, but it always scares the hell out of me. He says he would never hurt me, but every outburst gets worse frankly and, in that moment, I really thought about leaving. Am I overreacting? Just letting unfounded fear get the better of me?

Answer

Abusive people often start with throwing things in anger before they start throwing punches at you. 
I don’t think you are over-reacting

Answer

“Clerical error”. Are you sure he didn’t leave off your name on purpose so you would have no claim to the house if you tried to leave? His behavior is abusive and scary. What if instead of the floor it was you? And why would be get so upset about this?

Answer

Not having your name on the house is actually a blessing. It makes it easier to walk away without any ties. You say he'd never hurt you but he already has, hes hurt you enough to make you cower in the corner and cry. That's not normal. It's abuse. Who's to say next time he won't put his hands on you? Leave before it gets worse

Answer

Wow, that’s a great way to get you off topic and never bring it up again. 
Sorry, but I wouldn’t stand for that pathetic behaviour. If he carries this any further such as physical abuse, the house isn’t in your name and you won’t be able to claim anything if you leave him.

Answer

Seriously think about whether you should marry this guy. Most guys do not change, they get worse. Next time he may grab you or throw something and it ‘accidentally’ hits you or your baby down the road. Not cool 🤷🏼‍♀️. 
Trust your gut. Id hate for you to wake up one day with an injury, i especially wouldnt want to risk it with a child.

Answer

I wouldn't worry about the house not being in your name. Unless you signed a prenup most states will realize he's married and half of it is yours. I'd be more concerned about his anger issues..

Answer

No. Those are Big Red Flags and you’d be silly to ignore them And your gut.

Answer

Get out now. Not long until YOU become the thing he’s throwing onto the ground

Answer

You're not, but that behaviour over a simple conversation seems extreme. You say it happens often. Has he ever gone for counselling? Have you two tried couples therapy?

Answer

No he really shouldn't react that way. He needs to learn to control himself and have real discussions. His behavior is a red flag.

Am I overreacting?

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