A healthy baby is the bare minimum

I hardly ever talk about my eldest sons birth because it was one of the worst experiences of my life. Its long, depressing, and ends with me alone on a table while people dig around in my insides after they took my son out of the room without even a glance or touch. There was nothing wrong with him, or me, but he was still taken from me. I wasn't the first person to hold him, kiss him, look into his eyes. That was taken from me. I'm now pregnant with my second and my SO and I have been arguing like crazy because I will do everything in my power to not go through that hell again. I will not be bullied by him or the medical staff. I want so much more from this birth as its my last. I want to experience natural birth and the pain and beauty that comes with it. I don't want to look back in anger and regret. But all he can say is that a healthy baby is all that matters. Isn't that the minimum? Is there not allowed to be any satisfaction or even contempt from birth? Am I wrong that I feel there is so much more to birth than a healthy baby? Is there happiness, empowerment, anything else??? Am I alone in this feeling?