It's a long one! Also slightly traumatizing 😖

Wednesday the 29th of Jan at 39+5 we were scheduled to see the OBGYN again. While in the waiting room I became incredibly faint, resulting in passing out on the way into the doctors office. I'd been having these issues for a few weeks and we decided that it was time to get this little guy out and arranged to start my induction on Monday the 3rd of Feb when I would be 40+3. After a very busy few days cleaning and organizing the house, it was finally time to travel the 1.5hrs to the hospital we would be giving birth at. Hubby and I decided to come in on the Sunday night and spend one last night with just the two of us in a hotel ready for our 8oclock start. After only 3 hours of sleep we nervously arrived at the hospital and had cervidil inserted at 9:30. We were then moved to a ward where we would spend the day and night waiting around before my waters were set to be broken at 6am Tuesday morning. Around 3pm I began to feel some cramping after doing some laps of the ward and spending time on the birthing ball. Come 9oclock I was moved into a labour and delivery room as the contractions started hard and were very frequent. Little progression was made over night, I came in at a 1 and cervix was 2cm long and I was now a 2 with a 1cm long cervix. At midnight I decided on a shot of morphine as the contractions had a mind of their own and I would get 5 back to back with no breaks. Finally 6am rolled around when it was time to break my waters. Little rest was had all night but I was ready as ever. The membrane was easily torn but bubs head was slightly blocking it so it was a slow trickle over hours. This is when the pitocin was started also. Come 9am I was once again experiencing 5 or 6 back to back with no break and I could no longer handle them. I had my epidural and was in pure bliss, managing to nap for a few hours. Some bread was allowed at this point but I swiftly threw it up and began to feel pressure in my bottom. Our beautiful midwife checked and to our shock, I was 10cm!!! The midwife allowed me to rest for an hour to get some energy up and for her to have her lunch before finally it was time to push. I believe this was around 2-2:30pm. I had made a point of not wanting to know the time during the whole process so I can't be sure. After 30mins of pushing there were doctors suddenly arriving in our room. Our boy wasn't handling the contractions and his heart rate was skyrocketing then dropping too low with every push. The decision was made to use forceps and at this point, I was just so ready to have him out. 2 cuts were made to make room for the forceps and next thing I know, I see the most beautiful thing I've ever seen in my life! At 3:46pm, Feb 4th 2020 I finally met my son 😍 luckily my husband was still able to catch baby as this has been his wish the whole time. I receive him on my chest while my placenta is delivered and then hear some shattering news. I had a 3rd degree tear as well as the 2 episiotomy cuts. I was to go off to theatre as soon as it was available to be cleaned and stitched as it broke through my anal wall also. After an hour of skin to skin and attempted breastfeeding, I was wheeled away to theatre. Completely heartbroken to be leaving my son and husband without even knowing his weight, height or exact time of birth. After a lengthy 2.5hrs in theatre and 30 mins in recovery I am finally taken back to my family. My husband is so smitten and in love he barely realised I was back 😂 I learned Mr Logan Daniel Rosenblatt was born at 3:46pm at 8lb8oz, 53.2cm long and a head circumference of 36.5cm😮😮 I had a feeling he would be long and have a huge head and I was very right! Hubby left to get me some food and the nurses helped me shower, where I decided to pass out again... twice. Thanks to some quick thinking from the midwife I didn't hit the floor and damage any of my stitches. I was slowly moved back to bed where I finally had some food and breastfed once again, semi successfully. It is now 5:40am on the 5th and I am wide awake after having some antibiotics administered. I am very tender and very tired but I have never been so damn in love! Would do it all again in a heartbeat for this beautiful boy 🥰🥰