So I have two kids with my ex, well I lost them because of her lies and everyone thinks I’m on drugs even though I’m not I tested clean for everything even weed I just have anxiety and that’s why I was shaking at the case. Well, I lost both of them that day they wanted the pee test which was in December and then I was with this guy not dating him just a friend only a friend and he didn’t even tell me he had a crime for rape I think and I was blamed for that even though I didn’t know so they made me have supervised visits and they wanted me to pay $2500 which I don’t have and they want me to pay that to see my kids when I don’t have the money and I’ve been thinking about not going to court for it, because the judge thinks I’m unstable and doesn’t want me to have custody at all for the kids because of my mental illness which I only have ptsd, depression and anxiety, and they think I’m on drugs as well which I’m not. Well, I just talked to my ex and see if he could drop the case, have full custody of the kids I’m not stable enough to have them or care for them at the moment, it’s the best decision. He said I can discuss this with his lawyer and I asked him what happens if I don’t show up and apparently I would lose custody and get arrested which I don’t understand when it’s a custody case. Please don’t judge me..