I don’t know what I’ve been feeling lately. I just realized my room is a mess and I can’t see the floor. I got an email from my school campus stating that my professor raised a red flag based on my attendance . (I’ve missed that class 4x) I feel very unmotivated. Also I cry way too often. After I got the email, I took a shower and sobbed. I’m so scared of my future. I don’t know what is in store for me. I can’t set goals for myself. I feel like there’s no point. I turned to google and asked what the difference between depression & laziness was. & I obviously cannot diagnose myself, but I relate to a lot of the ‘depressed’ self. Earlier today I made a video of myself speaking out what I was feeling. (Basically venting) I’m afraid to show anyone. I’m scared my family will write me off as dramatic. My friends don’t know what to do but say, “it’ll pass. We’ve all been through it.” BUT I DONT KNOW HOW TO GET OUT OF THIS STAGE. Normally when I’m not feeling myself (which I don’t even know what that is like anymore) I listen to music and dance or listen to classical music and just breathe. That doesn’t work anymore. I get very bored and impatient. I feel like I’m doing the same routines. The video I made earlier is sitting in my hidden album. What do I do? I don’t know who to shoe it to. I just know that it can’t be my parents. They’ll just say I told you so. You are on your own. You just need to do more to get over it. ... who am I?