Entering A Previous Relationship While Pregnant With Someone Else’s Child

So I’m very hesitant about embarking on this journey.

I’m pretty young, 26, but I’m a college graduate, I have a great job, still working on the house and marriage ordeal but I’m doing alright.

I have a seven year old son and my relationship failed with his father because he had ptsd after his deployment and he become abusive and refused to seek treatment.

Boom, in 2018 I starting dating a guy that was actually really great. My son loved him. We traveled. But he struggled opening up emotionally and I felt more invested in the relationship than he was so I wanted a break. Then he accused me of stepping out on him and I was supppppperrrrrr pissed off and said the hell with that entire situation. We ended on very explosive bad terms. We dated for a little over a year.

Boom, in 2019 met another guy who seemed great too. Very in touch with emotions, business oriented, and a father himself, our sons were the same age actually. So things were going fine, until he lost his place. Then all of a sudden all this drama and baggage starts to surface. His business was ran unprofessionally and illegitimately. He started depending on me to carry out many of his work tasks while I worked my regular job, went to school, and took care of my son and the house. He moved into my house started helping me with some household bills inconsistently. Next thing you know, a bench warrant is put out for his arrest. He never turned himself in like he said he would. Then his money became virtually nonexistent bc he was afraid of getting arrested. Then he would become really mean and I didn’t understand why because he was never like that. We would have good days but they were far and in between. Welp we were planning to end things in the beginning of December. Then I found I was expected but I couldn’t live with anymore because I was afraid of his temper. It even got to the point were he tried to take my car keys and phone because I wouldn’t let him borrow my car. It turns out the man has untreated bipolar disorder. Dealing with his mood swings overwhelm and depress me. I feel like there’s no realistic possibility of us building a future because of challenges. He also has a suspend drivers license and terrible credit. I discovered all of this in February 2020. I broke it off with him but he’s still wants a relationship.

Boom, in 2020, I move back home with my son and unborn child in tow with the plan of saving to buy a house and the guy from 2018 pops up at the house. He arrived while I was at work with Christmas gifts in hand for my son and mother and etc. When I got home he apologizes to me. begging for me to be in his life again. I agree to goto dinner with him. I literally explain my entire situation and he didn’t care. He basically wants to pick up where we left off. He feels as though he will raise both children as his own and have more with me. I feel so bad because although I still love him, I’m not comfortable having sex or anything like that. It just seems weird. He wants to get married and buy a house and get me a new car, and etc etc.

At this point, I’m 19 weeks pregnant and uncertain. I damn near feel selfish getting back with him because he has no children, he has a very successful business, decent credit, and he has been very emotionally involved with me. He also spent 2019 with another woman and he said it just wasn’t the same. But I feel like I’m robbing him because of the baggage I have. But he is really excited about the baby, he very very excited.

Do you think I should be open and see where this goes? Or put my foot down and stick to my original plan regardless of what’s going on now.