Miscarriage and sisterin law


So i had a miscarriage a little over a month ago... just found out today my sister in law is due the same week I was. Im trying to be positive but at the same time I literally hate myself. I was just so excited it would have been my first. I bought new toothpaste even to be careful. My heart is broken. I have to keep my head up because every Wednesday we do family dinners. I see her

and see where (i wish) i was at. Watching my baby grow. I feel so lost and angry at the world.