First off let me say, I LOVE my husband he is a wonderful man just with a few short comings.....

Now... I have a very strict religious background and I lived at home until the day I got married. I never had sex until the day I got married... my husband was my first kiss... yada yada what I'm trying to say is I was very sheltered lol I fell in love with a very sweet, caring, sensitive quiet man who loves me with all his heart... and that's all that mattered.

WELLLLLL..... a couple of years into the marriage, and the freedom to do what I want, research what i want and find out who i am and what i really like.... i realize this sweet, caring, sensitive man... is a big pushover, in EVERY aspect of his life... and I need more...

I have discussed this with him... I have told him that I need someone who is dominate, determined. Someone who knows what they want and they take it. Someone who will stand up for me (and themselves) in front of anyone who says or does anything negative to me. I shouldn't have t0 come to my own defense when you are standing right there. And when it comes to sex.... Hell yes, man TAKE IT. Tell me what to do, and when I say tell me, I mean TELL ME and if I dont do it right... I'm willing and ready to take punishment. I'm into cuffs and rope and whips and all that fun stuff....

But when I told him all this he seems to take it and be okay with it and says "okay", "I understand" but then nothing changes. We are a quarter of the way thru year 6 now and I'm still hoping there is a beast inside him somewhere that is begging to come out and I just havnt found that key yet but I'm starting to lose hope and its killing me.

Do you have any ideas, or advise, or encouragement out there?