Toxic relationship cheating boyfriend

So I’ve been in this toxic long distance relationship for 3 years I would see him twice a year winter break and summer , well really by toxic I mean he’s been cheating on me with the same girl over and over, let me explain at the beginning the first year was perfect he’s super sweet and other than boyfriend he was an amazing friend, so after a while this girl that worked with him started persuing she’s known for getting in between relationships I’ve heard rumors anywayss him and her apparently started having a relationship while he was still with me and she knew .. so he technically had 2 girlfriends .. only I was like 8482 kilometers away from him and well she literally worked with him. Every time I would confront him about it he would deny being with her and all that you know the same lies they all tell . I would see them together in stories or pictures that other people posted .. because he would not post anything about me nor her or like any of our pictures. I pictured a life with this man we would talk about marriage and all LOL.

And before you girls say anything I tried leaving SO MANY TIMES but I just couldn’t love is truly blind and it makes you dumb literally . I was completely in love with him and I wouldn’t even listen to my own head I knew this was completely messing my life up , and I hated myself so much for not being able to leave.

but a couple months ago I started realizing this wasn’t going anywhere I started letting go of the thought of spending my life with him and soon I noticed every time he did me dirty it started hurting less and less until I finally was able to leave him and oh my god that was reliving finally I won’t have to go to sleep with the thought of anyone cheating on me.

I know a lot of you girls are probably going through similar situations and listen please leave it’s so hard to let go but it’s harder to stay somewhere where you’re the only one trying.

Now I want to focus on myself and definitely work on loving myself before I decide to love anyone else I will NEVER EVER let this happen to me again I owe the biggest apology to myself ..

And for them I hope she opens her eyes someday also because a man like that will never change I don’t wish them bad .. just what they deserve ..

( I’m 19 he’s 23 and she’s 25) fun fact lol