This is something I’ve been thinking about a lot lately, and I’m very stubborn but a lot of hurt and pain has been caused over the years by my in laws to myself and fiance.

My fil sexually harassed me and touched me inappropriately as a teen, and my fiancé was exposed to many things of a sexual nature as a child that he shouldn’t have been. Mil never protected us from this and doesn’t believe us. But we both know she knows the truth.

I carry a huge burden because of this and I have a lot of hatred for them. STRONG hatred and honestly can’t help but to wish bad things on them. Although this is taking a huge toll on my mental health and it burdens me every day because I think about it and get angry all day every day for years now.

They’ve been cut out of our lives, and that’s something that I never want to change.

Can you really forgive someone who isn’t sorry? Who doesn’t acknowledge their mistakes and most likely never will?

I’m considering forgiveness just for my own inner peace. They don’t need to know if I forgive them or not.

I don’t want to carry this emotional baggage around anymore. I don’t want them to have this much control over my mind.

Is there a difference between forgiveness and letting go?

Do they deserve my forgiveness? Probably not. But do they deserve to have huge control over my mind and mental health? Again probably not.

I just want to feel in control. I’m not a bad person.