Do I like her or am I lonely? (Please send feed-back i would appreciate it)

I’ve never really liked a girl before so I could be lonely but then again there’s always a first.

I am literally unable to get with her because of some stupid bylaws from an student organization that we are a part of. I haven’t touched a person in like 2.5 months and I feel lonely I’ve literally had one other person regularly speak to me besides the people I live with and then she and I start talking and we are literally FaceTiming for 6 hours straight and late at night and we just told each other everything about each other and I haven’t trusted anyone more. She says she’s straight but she wants to kiss a girl to make sure (but she also says that she doesn’t define her sexuality). She’s older than I am by a few years and the sister of someone that’s in my grade. My parents wouldn’t be supportive and would kick me out of the house if I liked girls and her parents are uncomfortable with that too. I have never felt more comfortable around someone and I’m scared because she’s older, my friends sister, possibly straight, I don’t know what I am, my parents would kill me, and we would both get kicked out of our organization because it states that we cannot date other members. I want to just be around her she is amazing. She’s fun and adventurous and maybe that’s what I like: she’s a rebel. Idek at this point I just need help please. I’ve been stressing out about this for too long and I can’t do anything and I just need someone to tell me what to do please. Thanks in advance. Stay safe!