I'm so jealous it hurts

I'm writing here in hope to get some help. I've always been very ambitious and driven. School has always been my everything and I've always been a straight A student. School was my escape from my abusive family. After high school I was given full paid scholarship at my country's best university, so I studied law because it was my dream. I finished university and my life was about to begin. Then, long story short, my dad tried to kill me. My neighbour saw it all and I'm alive thanks to him. My dad went to jail and I was left with PTSD, panic attacks, severe anxiety and depression. I managed to overcome my depression, my anxiety and panic attacks are okay now, but my PTSD persists. After ten years it's still to the point I'm not able to work. I might never be able to. I've been in therapy the whole time and still am. I met my husband in the middle of this and we have a beautiful baby. But I'm not where I wanted to be in life. My baby wasn't planned and after I found out I was pregnant my I kind of gave up, because my husband wanted to have a child so bad. I love my baby, but I'm a stay at home mom and I'm stuck with that. This wasn't the life I wanted.

I'm terribly jealous of my sister in law, because she has the life I wanted. She too went to law school, I went to a more prestigious university then her, but that doesn't matter in the end. She and her husband has a perfect relationship (she has told me their worst fights are about her leaving the dishes in the sink sometimes...), they just bought a dream house, while we're stuck renting because we can't afford buying anything because I can't work and my husband doesn't make enough. She just had a baby as well and she's the favourite child in my husband's family because she's so successful. I obviously don't have any contact with my family. And it's killing me to see her with her perfect life.

I wanted that. That was my dream. But I can't ever have it. And it sucks. It hurts. I'm nice to her, don't get me wrong. I would never ever tell anyone how I really feel because I know I'm childish and stupid for this, but I can't help it. Having someone else getting your dream and having it in your face all the time it's unbearable. I've talked to my therapist about it but these feelings don't disappear. I want to be nothing but happy for her, but instead I turn everything into a secret pity party. I really really want to be better. Help!