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I feel like nobody will ever love me & that I’m not worthy. I feel so much fear. I’m thinking about suicide. So much is building up and I need to let go. My life has been going too fast before recently. I’ve slowed down the fast life, the past is creeping up on me. I feel a loss sense of self & attachments to people in the past. I was so drugged up when I was a teenager. It’s not like I want to go back anymore, I just don’t want to face what was really going on during my middle & high school years. And the truth is I was struggling with anorexia at only 15 years old. I’m 18 now. And its honestly so scary because at 16 I tried committing suicide as a effect with drugs. & I feel gone. Like I’m not there. What is my life. I’ve been suicidal since a child & now it’s my reality. I’m just trying to find some hope. I’m trying to be more positive but I don’t understand how, I’m tired. Everyday I feel a little bit of a struggle. I know I’m on the right road, and I can honestly say I’m doing quite well. But I’ll admit, the things ive gone through in life was hard & I feel like all the past years of my life are catching up to me all right now. I feel very stressed out. So, I lay in bed all day. I’m trying to process all my trauma. How can I find the light? I feel like I keep messing up. I’ve started taking the days slow, and I’ve been feeling better. Maybe I need rest. I feel like I’m too young for all of this. Self care helps me feel better. How can I better my life by facing my trauma now that I’m out of high school & need real help. My mental health is fine, it’s hard for me to face all my trauma at once. Any tips on healing and finding the light, I don’t want to go down a different path when I know it’s possible to come out of this with happiness, love, positivity, strength, & light. I accept I’m still a little lost in darkness right now & I accept that, things take time. And I’m finding new coping mechanisms instead of being destructive. I know I need more time at the current state I am of recovery, any advice to help me through this time of getting better? ♥️