Help with sex

My husband and I have been married for 10 years, we got married very young I had just turned 18 to actually get married, but where together about 4 months before. At first our sex life was great we would have sex non stop constantly, up to 3 or 4 times a day and his lasted up for about 7 years. We had 2 kids between that time and I waited 5 years between the 2nd and third baby which by year 7 of our marriage I got pregnant with our 3rd child. As soon as I had that baby I got pregnant right away so my 2 boys are 11 months apart, during that time we would still have sex but not as much since I was caring for our 2 older boys plus a baby and yet being pregnant and fat 😕 so as soon as I had my last baby I decided to tie my tubes! Well after that my sex has been so out of wack I’m never in the mood I’m always dry and I can never do anything right! I’ve tried porn toys lube everything and nothing seems to work. After a while he started to notice the change in me and he kind of started distancing in me in sex, like for example he wouldn’t ask for it unless he knew it he been a while that we had done it. So let’s say we would have sex a Sunday morning in his day off we wouldn’t have sex again till the next Saturday night. I asked him about it and he says it’s because he’s tired from work 🤷🏻‍♀️ which I understand but before I had my last 2 kids he worked the same and yet managed to have sex at least every other day. I don’t know if it’s me or if he’s just lost interest in me. I cry almost every night thinking about it. I feel like I’m not good enough for him no more I’ve become so insecure with myself I feel so ugly from inside and out. I’ve tried working on my appearance but I still don’t think that works for me. I’ve managed to loose weight eat healthy have my house clean cook food everyday and yet I still feel I’m not good enough. Him on the other hand tells me otherwise, he tells me I’m perfect and I shouldn’t worry, but I just don’t believe him 😔 I don’t have friends and I don’t talk to my family because they’re really religious and I’m not and all they will tell me to do is read the Bible it pray and things like that and in my opinion I don’t think that works or helps. I have no social media other than this, and him on the other hand he has Facebook idk about other apps like Snapchat instagram or things like that as I don’t look through his phone or anything I don’t want to look for something that I’m scared I’ll find that will hurt me. I asked him if I could get on his Facebook a few weeks ago to look at a page where they sale coupons, that’s where I usually get them and as I logged in I seen he had a message so me of course I go in and see the message and there was a girl more like a porn video and I think one of his friends messaged him the video and as I keep looking there was a whole lot more. All I could do at that moment was cry because I was hurt idk why because it’s just a porn video from his friends but still it hurt. I righty away got out of his messages and left it at that. I didn’t mention it to him or nothing because that’s not my business, he kind of noticed I was a little distant that day and he asked me what was wrong, I didn’t say anything I just kept to myself and that when he kind of figured out I was bothered with the whole messages. He just asked me if that was what wrong with me and i ignored him so he knew that’s what I was upset sad about. He just told me not to worry about it that it’s nothing. We’ve always had problems with infidelity since the moment we’ve been married, idk if it’s considered as cheating that he’s never actually had sex with any of the girls but he’s always talked to them either from his past or women he’s work with, and before anyone says he’s allowed to have friends and talk to women YES I GET THAT! But not the way he would, he would always talk shit about me to them or talk about how he missed them and things like that. He was even working with one of his fuck buddies of course I had no say in it because that’s his job and he would always go to her house they would go out to eat together and spend time together. And when she would talk to me, she would tell me things like “he says you’re a good mother to his kids and you keep your house clean but he’s just with u for that” with out me even asking! But this post isn’t about him, I guess I just needed that off my chest. This post is about me how can I fix myself how can I over come feeling like shit and worthless. There’s times I want to leave him not because of our problems but he deserves to happy and I’m not the person who can make him happy because I’m always annoying feeling sad depressed. I have bad anxiety there’s days I don’t sleep because I’m always overthinking things. I know this is my fault and I always thought that having sex would make my issues go away and he would still wants me and that’s why we’ve lasted so long, but now that I can’t even do that right what’s the purpose of him being with me. He deserve someone who can give him the sex I used to he deserves someone who doesn’t always feel depressed he deserves someone who is happy and loves themself. And I am not that person. I hate myself I hate the person I’ve become I hate how I look how I feel I can’t control it! I feel the older I get the more shittier person I am, who’s going to want an older women when there’s so many beautiful young women out there that can offer better sex and life than me. Keeping a house clean and dinner on the table doesn’t always keep a man. I’m almost in my 30s and that’s what’s getting to me my body isn’t the same my face skin everything isn’t the same, thinking that plastic surgery would change the way I feel, well it doesn’t! He thinks I’m over reacting at times and that’s why I just stay quit but even when he notices that I’m quit he doesn’t bother ask me if I’m ok or anything. Last night was my final thought we tried having sex after more than a week of waiting I couldn’t even do that I was dry dry dry I couldn’t orgasm and that’s that I had a damn vibrater, he did finish which is good I suppose but after that I cried for an hour to just think I can’t even have sex right, I’m so shitty I can’t even do that right. He just told me to not think like that and go to sleep. Thank u for listening to me complain I have no one to talk to so this helps me get it out there.