Okay. So something really became clear to me today. When abusive men convince women to move across the country in an effort to isolate them, tell them how to wear their hair, tell them what jobs they can have, etc., people respond with "I'm so sorry that happened to you." "I'm glad you're out now." "That must have been terrible." Etc.

However, when I tell people that I was pressured into having a baby, people respond with "pshh how can someone pressure/force you to have a baby?" My question is HOW ON EARTH IS IT ANY DIFFERENT??????? It's exactly the same thing. I was pressured into doing something that I didn't want to do or feel good about because I was in an abusive situation. My self- confidence and my ability to trust my own decisions had been beat to death. I hardly knew what my favorite color was.

Yet somehow even feminists don't see this, which I think is indicative of a larger issue. I think people get behind these movements and develop these opinions that they're "supposed" to have without even really understanding what the hell they're standing for. The real feminists understand what I mean when I was pressured into having a baby. I was afraid of what would happen if I did anything else. When I gently brought up my concerns, they were dismissed and I was told that I was overthinking things. When I pushed a little harder, all I got was demeaning, sarcastic comments, put-downs, and raised voices. I was manipulated and abused and THAT is how someone got me to have a baby that I didn't wast to have. Ladies, we've got to do better than this. If you truly support women, you need to be educated on all types of abuse and ther effects they can have. This is just unacceptable and I'm angry that still so few people understand what I mean when I tell my story. I know that there are more women who have kids they didnt wasnt to have because of similar situations, but they don't dare speak up because of responses like this.