home inseminaion

So in 2018 I was a victim of rape as of then I’ve never wanted to have sex with a man ever again I feel physically sick as the thought but March 2019 one of my best friends who’s a male offered his sperm to me so I could still experience being a mum with having to have sex which I went through with home insemination it worked and became pregnant but unfortunately I lost the baby at 17weeks I felt like shit but the babies dad said if I want to try again he’s more than happy to help me but the only thing stopping me is what if I loose the next one or am I really not good enough to be a mum from my horrible experience, please could someone give me advice I really want to have my own child/children but just worry I’m not good enough