I need a little rant because I’m upset

I’ve suffered with depression for so long and lately I’ve noticed that it’s slightly creeping back up on me.

I had my little girl June 2018 and I was so happy because I was told I couldn’t have kids, this was a massive accomplishment for me as I was a massive failure growing up. When my daughter was around 3/4 months we moved back closer to my family as I got postnatal depression, I just wanted my mother. We moved down in September and for once I actually felt like I did something and I had somewhat spotlight but October time my sister randomly got pregnant, I wasn’t happy because I felt like she did it on purpose. After a few months we found out it was a boy and the whole family was excited because that was the first boy for 25 years.

My little family slowly started to get pushed out of stuff, we weren’t getting invitations anymore for places, they were doing stuff behind our backs and it felt as if my daughter wasn’t getting attention at all from my family.

Soon as my sister gave birth everything changed massively, nobody came to visit my daughter anymore or myself which is a horrible feeling. I’ve had massive run ins with my family about how it’s so one sided but I’m always called stupid or petty.

I just missed my family and I felt as if it was just what it was like growing up, was left out and wasn’t cared about. My partner works most nights so the days I’m on my own and I do my best, yet I’m told I couldn’t handle another baby? We’ve recently found out after my sister broke up with her partner she got pregnant again after I mentioned me and my partner wanted to try for another baby.

It’s gotten worse and I feel as if I’m just not cared about at all? I feel as if my daughter and my family is left out all the time, she’s even noticed how one sided it is and she’s 2!

I’m sorry for how long this is I just couldn’t hold back anymore and it sucks that my family don’t give a shit about anything