FUCK YOU! You are such a bitch that only comes around when you want something from me. Since our father passed away, I did EVERYTHING I could to try to bond with you. I continuously brushed off my feelings to keep a relationship with you. I put your needs before my own. Now that I have a daughter, I can no longer do that. I cannot set a push over example to my daughter.

I brushed off that the only time you hung out with me was to go to concerts. I brushed off that not even once have you EVER invited me to a concert with you (regardless of if I like the musicians or not, I just want to spend time with you and I expressed that to you). I brushed off that you completely made my birthday dinner all about you and your mom issues to the point where I never want to have a birthday dinner again. I brushed off that you just stop talking to me in the middle of a conversation and not hit me up for months. I brushed off the fact that I wasn't apart of ANY of your wedding events, but you still wanted me to host your Bachelorette party (which I did and tried to make it as fun as possible even though you switched the location the day of and told me a lie for that location change). I brushed off the fact that you still had an attitude towards me the next day because I had to go pick up my partner due to him having car issues. I brushed off the fact that I didn't hear from you until MONTHS after. I brushed off the fact that once I told you that I was pregnant, you didn't care about visiting UNTIL you found out I moved into a bigger place. I brushed off the fact that you were supposed to help me with my baby shower. I brushed off the fact that you said you were coming to the first two and never showed up. I brushed off the fact that you didn't even tell me you were coming to the third one, but popped up anyways. I brushed off the fact that I blatantly told both you and your husband not to come over the weekend after you already visited due to my partner having to work and you guys still popped up to "surprise me". I brushed off the fact that you tried to manipulate my emotions to ask if you and your husband could move in with my partner and I. I brushed off the fact that you tried to rush my answer. I brushed off the fact that you asked to move in with me when I expressed to you that we moved so our lo could have her own room. I brushed off the fact that you didn't talk to me after months once I told you no. I brushed off the fact that when you asked to live with me and I said no, I expressed how worried I was for you and your husband; and you still disregarded my feelings and chose upon yourself not to update me on what was going on. I brushed off the fact that I hit you up a day before my due date and received no response. I brushed off the fact that you hit me up, not to first ask about your niece, but to first ask if I got concert tickets. I brushed off the fact that once I told you that I didn't get the concert tickets because they went on sale a week before my due date and my daughter would only be 5 months by the time of the concert, that is when you asked if I had her yet. I brushed off the fact that the day you called to ask that, was a month after she was born. I brushed off the fact that you only came by to visit because you also fell pregnant and wanted to practice on my daughter. I brushed off the fact that I blatantly told you not to pick her up if she wakes up from her sleep and to just let me know if I didn't hear her; you still chose to disregard that. I brushed off the fact that I was diagnosed with PPA and paranoia(no I never told you that, but you touching her when I told you not to triggered it). I brushed off the fact that I blatantly told you, I do not want our kids matching, but you still proceeded to get matching outfits (triggering my paranoia and anxiety again).

What I refused to brush off was how you COMPLETELY showed that you didn't give two shits about my daughter, your niece. This was evident the last time you came to visit. She was SPITTING UP BLOOD (for anyone who's reading this, she ended up being fine. I panicked as a ftm) and not once did you send a text while my partner and I were in the ER for 9 hours. You stayed sleep until 3:00pm. You stayed sleep as we got home, I put her to sleep, I took a shower, I ate breakfast, she woke up, I changed her diaper, I fed her, I put her back to sleep, I took a nap, I woke up, she woke up, and I fed her again. You did not wake up until I was on my way to change her diaper. Then the ONLY thing you say to me is "hi sister" you did not ask how she was or anything. You consoled my partner and talked to him about what happened, but did not talk to me about anything. You did not care until 2 days later when you texted me asking if I pumped. I DON'T PUMP and I've expressed this to you. It's discouraging for me and I've expressed that.

I brushed off the fact that I told you I needed time to myself and that I'll catch you up with what's going on; and still, you disregarded that to ask if I had your mom's number (I was in the middle of having a breakdown, later diagnosed as PPD). I brushed off the fact that the exact next week, you still disregarded my request to see if you had anything to do with it. I brushed off the fact that I expressed my own personality to you and that I needed more time when you tried to make it about you. I brushed off the fact that you tried to pressure me to tell you how I was feeling because it wasn't fair to you that I needed more time. I brushed off the fact that I still rushed my healing time to try to talk to you in two weeks about my feelings. I brushed off the fact that you still tried to pressure me to tell you my feelings over the phone or through text when i blatantly expressed to why doing that made me uncomfortable. I brushed off the fact that you joked about me needing to express my feelings to you. I brushed off the fact that I expressed to you that I brush off my feelings a lot when it comes to you, and you still asked for me to brush off my feelings so that we could have casual conversation. I brushed off the fact that you said that you didn't want to hear my feelings because I did not want to have casual conversation with you. I brushed off the fact that when we did set a date to catch you up on what was going on with me, you canceled the day of and did not even care to tell me until I texted you saying not to ring the doorbell when you get here because my daughter will be sleep. I brushed off the fact that, again, you made a day that I wanted to open up to you be about you and your problems with your mom. I brushed off the fact that you needed to know if I tried to ambush you with your mom (which I didn't), but didn't need to know how I felt. I brushed off the fact that you blamed me for your mom bring disrespectful towards you; when had you came, I guarantee you that wouldn't have happened. I brushed off the fact that you couldn't even trust me to protect you from her.

What I will not brush off is me standing up for myself. If you don't want to be apart of my daughter's or my life, then so be it.

Don't think for a second that I regret any of the decision that I made. I know for a fact that I'm not inconsiderate. I set boundaries and you realized that you could no longer cross them. You make no sense. How could you tell me that if I want a relationship with you or my soon to be nephew, then I need to hit you up, but you block me? You aren't doing me a disservice by blocking me, but a disservice to the next generation that we are creating.

That is why I am hurt. A month later.. Yes, I am hurt. Yes, I was triggered by our argument and spiraled into a breakdown. I am somewhat healed. I am hurt mostly because my daughter won't know her cousin because of your childish actions. She won't know her cousin because you don't know how to have a relationship without using people and continuously crossing boundaries (grammar check; this sounds right and wrong at the same time lol). She won't know her cousin because of your selfishness.

I will no longer brush off my feelings. If I'm an inconsiderate bitch, then so be it. I deserve to be at this point.