Emotional abuse to a child 😩

Long story short, my son’s dad physically and emotionally abused me for years, he’s a complete narcissist.

Anyways we’ve been split for 3 years now, my son has regular visits, there’s always been a worry for me of how he treats our son considering he treated me so bad. But hadn’t really stood out till about a month ago...

A month ago I picked my son up from dads house and he was balling his eyes out, his dad said he gave him a row for breaking something in the house. My son said this was an accident. Anyways once I left his dads my son broke down and told me that his dad then grabbed one of his favourite toys and stomped on it and said ‘ if you break my stuff I’ll break yours’ 🥺 my son was breaking his heart to me!!

Once this happened I spoke to his dad and told him that it wasn’t acceptable and he lied, straight to my face lied and said it didn’t happen. So I cut down the time my son spent with him. Every second fortnight he slept over from then.

Now today, I went to pick my son up from dads he came out looking timid but cracked a smile once he seen me, he got in the car and sat quiet, he just let his dad talk, when we drove off he burst out crying saying that his dad shouted at him for singing a song. And then said he missed his dad🤷🏻‍♀️

So we get home I reassure him, then I notice his trousers are all wet before bath time (I always have to bath him straight from dads as he is absolutely stinking of smoke) so I asked him, ‘have you had an accident, he said yes! I asked him when? cause he would usually tell me. He said he peed himself at his dads, I asked him why he didn’t tell him. And he said his dad would get really angry if he had peed himself 😔

I’m at my wits end with this!!!!

He emotionally abused me for years and years and now he’s doing it to our son. He’s belittling him so much from what my son has told me😔

He says he likes his dad but at same time his dad is making him sooooo upset, I don’t know what to do 😩😩😩

He’s only 4 years old may I add so way to young to be making up stories like his dad tries to make out.

Any advice please would be great?

This is just two examples of a list full:

He smokes weed around my son,

Kept him out till 11pm while drinking,

Took him up woods with a fire while drunk,

Doesn’t provide for him at all,

I have to provide snacks etc when he goes,

He tells my son to tell my partner that he’ll never be his dad.

My son also went through a stage where he was telling me not to touch his penis, I automatically thought he’d been abused sexually I hounded his dad for all information of who he’s been around to then find out it had been his dad’s friends kids (older) had been up to it.

I feel sick to my stomach with everything but can I just cut contact even though he has rights 😩😩