My boyfriend of two years proposed to me yesterday and ever since then I’ve been deliriously happy. It feels like a dream and I cannot believe it’s finally happened. I love him so much. We had yesterday evening to bask in our own joy, so to speak, and we spent all of today telling family and friends in person.

After today I have to admit I am a little worried/overwhelmed about the prospect of wedding planning. My future MIL has very specific ideas about what she wants, and kind of expensive taste, but I’m glad to have her support and excitement/encouragement. When I went to share the news with my mom, I had barely begun to share my wedding ideas when she retorted that they can afford very little. She cut me off to retell me the story of how she was only given $40 by her parents for her wedding which they used to buy material to sew her own dress. (My parents are both elderly and grew up poor...were married in the early 70s I believe). She makes me feel like anything she didn’t have, I don’t deserve. My excitement is crushed and replaced by extreme guilt. My dad has stated that he would honestly prefer me to elope so they wouldn’t be burdened with paying for a wedding. I pretend to smile but it hurts my feelings. My fiancé and I have very economical ideas and are willing to foot some of the costs if necessary. He and I will probably go into a bit of debt over this.

My fiancé spent all of last year saving up for a ring. It is gorgeous and I would have loved it no matter how much or how little it cost. But today my mom started joking and hinting that i don’t deserve such an expensive ring and that I’m going to become one of those ugly girls who flaunt their expensive jewelry. This is the first nice piece of jewelry I’ve ever owned and probably will ever own, and she’s already making me feel guilty about it.

I’m now so anxious about planning this wedding. I would appreciate any tips and advice for planning, coping, and reasoning with parents throughout this process. I know many ladies are in or have been similar situations.

Thank you 💕