I’m tired. I'm tired of taking vitamins and keeping track. I'm tired of peeing on sticks and using my fingers to read mucus like it’s tea leafs in a friggin cup. I'm tired of other people's pregnancy announcements. I'm tired of my husband's ED and the "do you want to to take a pill?" sex. I'm tired of everyone telling me stuff like "there's plenty of time" or "it will happen when you stop thinking about it". I'm tired of my mom telling me "it's all natural" and of my mother-in-law only asking ME when I'll have a baby. I'm tired of my overweight, smoking, older husband functioning like nothing is a big deal. I'm tired of putting a pillow under my butt like I was some sort of bird being stuffed for dinner. I'm tired of people putting babies in my lap because I "need to train". I'm tired of thinking about it and of not thinking about it. I'm tired of feeling punished because everything, from my food to my mood, has to be just right. I'm just tired and TTC really sucks sometimes. That's it.