I bet this is gonna be long but here goes.firstly, I work at Starbucks

I was talking to my manager earlier today cause I wanted to know how much she should be aware of my history of severe mental illness. I explained to her best I could that it’s usually fine and manageable but this week has been really rough. It does affect my work a bit (I feel less social and motivated). To work where I am you need to interact with guests a lot, that’s the main part of it. C (my manager) asked me if I even wanted to be there and if it was the right job for me. It hurt cause I’ve been putting in a lot of effort and I do my best to interact, put on a happy face, and not complain. Now C had told me to speak up and let our SS (shift supervisors) know if I’m not feeling something and communicate. So I’ve been trying to do that. I guess it come off more as pushing back, being hesitant, and just being unhappy. I stayed in the same spot for my entire shift the other day and was a bit huffy being sent back when I had already been there for 3 hours. Other than that I thought I was doing really well and nobody seemed to feel weird around me. It was a shock when she told me everyone thought I hated it cause I’ve had many jobs and this is my favorite one. I guess I don’t know what to do with it. I’ve been working my ass off to do better and it’s done nothing. I can’t take time off to tend to my illness cause I have hospital, car and phone bills to pay off. I just don’t know if I should find a new job or try even harder here. How do I get better? How do I go about being somewhere I love whilst also dealing with mental health?

(She’s pairing me up with someone I connect with who understands my brain to work on some stuff, I’m terrified ill try my hardest and still end up fired).