To start I know I am stressing over something that isn't even here yet, but if you knew me you'd know it's what I do best 😂😩🙄 I need a plan for everything!

My husband has been casually applying for different jobs for awhile now, just to see what opportunities get presented to him and hoping he can make more money, as he feels he's going to hit a plateau quickly with his current employer and neither of us is completely satisfied with his current income (it pays the bills but we want to own a home and be able to afford more like vacations while still keeping me home with kids)

He just applied with a company and they are extremely interested in him, but told him if he isn't okay with relocating then they don't want to move further as this position is out of state, he asked where they would likely relocate him to as that could affect what our decision on moving forward would be. We are still waiting to hear where we would be relocating to.

I am having major anxiety over it.

A little back story:

My husband was born in California and grew up in Arizona he moved to Utah with the mother of our oldest when he found out he was going to be a daddy. He has almost 0 contact with his family (besides his grandma and his aunt)

I have lived in Utah my entire life, I have also lived next to my family pretty much my entire life except when I moved 3-3.5 hours away to go to college which is where I met my man. After we had our first child together we moved back to where my family lives (we are now a 10 minute drive to my parents house and have been for the last 7 years) Over those last 7 years we have gained full custody of our oldest, his biological mother has not been in his life. My family is really the only family our 3 kids know. We spend every single weekend at my parents house, which seems to be a double edge sword for me. We get burnt out but I can never say we don't want to go over (my husband is a saint about it) I absolutely love my family and never want them to feel left out or hurt their feelings but it makes it hard because I feel like we don't ever do things as our own family unit and if I do finally make a decision just us people feel left out and it makes me feel guilty to where I hardly ever do that, even little things like the zoo it ends up being everyone. It's hard. But at the same time it makes my anxiety extremely high thinking of leaving the state. I feel I almost have an unhealthy relationship with my family, but I'm worried to leave.

This last year my family (my moms 2 sisters, my 2 cousins and their kids) from out of state have all moved to Utah to be closer to everyone which also kills me, to turn around and leave once they all get here. I just don't know what to do.

My husband wouldn't mind leaving Utah (I feel for obvious reasons) he's also pretty excited about this job, he'd have to do 6 months of training but our income would increase almost $20,000. After training we'd be bumped to around $25,000-$30,000 more than we currently make, depending on where we were relocated. They would also pay for our move.

I just don't know if the extra money is worth leaving my family. Obviously we would visit but we wouldn't be seeing them like we do, which could also be a good thing?

I've looked up the companies locations and the closest possibility would be 5 hours away. But we would be looking more likely around 7-9 hours away. Unless they try sending us further. 🤷‍♀️ (again I don't know location yet, which would be helpful)

Ugh! I realize this is the longest post and probably makes no sense but I have 0 friends that aren't family and I feel I need to talk about it 😭😭 but I have no one I can talk to besides my hubby, which I have talked with him but I need outside opinions. 😭😭