I’ve been trying for 6.5 years to get pregnant after an abortion (and trust me, I have cried almost everyday during these years because i genuinely feel bad for the decision I made. At the time I did not have a place of my own, I didn’t know how to drive and didn’t have a job.. I lived in poverty and the animals would urinate on the floor inside my home often because they weren’t 100% potty trained.. they were not my animals)

3 years ago I met my husband and we started to try immediately, nothing happened, we got married 1.5 years ago and I got pregnant, but I MC right away.. so we’ve been trying .. we’ve been to doctors.. they say I have PCOS.. and I’ve been trying to manage it.. the tests say I do have spikes indicating I may ovulate (even though I know it’s not 100% accurate) doctor said I won’t get pregnant without atleast doing an <a href="https://glowing.com/glow-fertility-program">IUI</a> and I feel like an animal because it’s not the “natural” way and there’s no love involved since a stranger is inseminating me

My best friend got out of a 9 year long bad relationship and I only want the best for her so I mean nothing ill as I write this.. and she has a daughter from someone before that..she has had 2 abortions in between (from the 9 year guy) but she met a guy less than a year ago and they broke up recently because he said she expects more out of him since she’s older and it’s a lot of responsibility (he turned 23 in oct and she’s 30 in May)

But now she found out she was pregnant a week after they split (but they were still talking and on good terms) and I am very happy for her and I told her I’ll support in any way that I can help her.. but I also can’t help but wish that it could be me too (I’m not jealous to the point where I wish I was me and not others.. I wish we could genuinely both enjoy gods gift)

Day

So I’m asking, how do I be supportive without dealing with my own demons? I’m not angry or upset at her, I just really wish I could enjoy it like everyone else.