First, I’m a virgin, so I’ve never had an actual penis inside me and I’ve always avoided penetration. But recently I felt I needed more and actually want something inside me. The first time was pleasurable and there was no pain, mainly because I only used one finger, but the second time I used two and it was slightly painful, nothing terrible, just a bit of discomfort. But both times I felt faint. I had to stop the second time because I thought I might pass out if I kept going and my legs were soooo shaky. I kept reminding myself to relax my muscles and breathe but that only helped the discomfort I was feeling.

But the thing is, I don’t really know if something is up with my body or if it’s psychological. I’ve experienced sexual trauma in the past and penetration has always scared me because of that. I get so nervous and even a little scared. I want to enjoy penetration but how can I if this keeps happening? Anyone experience something similar?