So my husband and I were having a pretty deep conversation tonight. My old friend came up and we started talking about her.. I’ll call her Mary. I started to remember one night that Mary and I went out to the bar together. We met a group of ppl (some girls, some guys) and I don’t remember much after that because I was very drunk. I remember being in the car with 2 guys and Mary telling me after how we all had sex together. Because I was drunk, I don’t remember anything or how I even got to that point with the guys. Just to clarify Mary was not in the car when the 2 guys and I were having sex, she was just watching.

My husband got verrrryy upset (which I was expecting when I told him) and said I’m not the same girl he thought I was when I married him and how I’m disgusting. I was kind of hurt by those words and told him that I literally didn’t give consent, I was too drunk to understand what was physically happening. He did not understand and thought I was trying to defend myself. I told him that I thought I should be honest with him about my past, just as I would want him to be honest about his past with me. This literally happened 5 or 6 years ago and I feel that he is blowing this out of proportion. He’s so mad and won’t even touch me now and is really awkward around me. It’s really bothering me. I’m still the same girl he has been married to for 4 years. I thought he would be a bit more compassionate or understanding when I told him. Ugggh I feel so upset right now.

Can I get any opinions on what you would do in this situation?

Edit to add: I did not remember this situation AT ALL until my friend came up. The night started coming back to me in flashes. Obviously I would have told him if I remembered sooner.