So, my boyfriend broke up with me 2 days ago. Valentines Day would have been 1 year for us. We had been talking marriage and everything. I’m not mad that he broke up with me. I know that right now it’s what is best for him. He had to move a few hours away because there was more job opportunities there. He had promised me that he wasn’t going to break up with me because he loves me and wants to be with me. That we would make long distance work. Yet, here we are exactly 1 week after he left and he’s broken up with me.

He says he’s doing it because he needs to focus on work and getting custody of his 2 daughters. I completely understand and I didn’t fight him on it or anything. I simply told him how much I will always love him and wish the best for him and hope that we can always be friends. I can’t move up to where he is because I own my home and like my job. He wants us to get back together in the future, but I know it can never happen because I can’t do long distance forever. We could never have or be a family that way.

I’m trying so hard to be good about this because I truly love him enough to let him go for the best for him and his girls. But yet I also sit here and want him to be just as shattered about the break up as I am, but he’s not. At the same time I want him to be happy. I also find myself kinda wishing that he didn’t have kids. I love his girls and I know that’s disgusting and selfish of me, but it’s honestly just kinda how I feel. That will never change though and I accept that.

Am I crazy for feeling the way I do about this break up? I honestly just kinda want him to cry and be upset about losing me, but he’s not.