I have been dating my boyfriend for three years now.

This might be a very long and personal story, but I want to share it with someone so I can get my mind in the right direction.

At first, I thought he was perfect for me. Then after six months, when we fought over little things, he always said that I should find a new boyfriend. I always forgived him because I know he has been hurt big time. He was always so jealous, so I broke off all contacts with my friends which were men. And I ended up with two woman friends. I never had any male friends after we got together. Maybe after a year or less, a girl sent me a paragraph of how he was talking to her and sending her snaps and all. So I got mad, we fought, he as usually called me annoying and denied everything. He had so mamy female friends on snap and he was snaping them. And when we went on vacation together, I found out thst he was talking to another girl, and he changed her name to his sisters name so it would look like that he is always talking to his sister. And of course he denied and said that he changed her name so I wont get mad. And again, it was all my fault and I was the bad guy. Then again after a month, we went on my cousins wedding, and he got really drunk. And then he saw that I have a male friend on snapchat (that man added me but we didn't send each other any snaps), and then he saw his name on my friends list and while he was drunk he started calling me a slut, a bitch, that I am the same like his ex and I'm a slut and that we are like twins etc. And that really hurt me. He was talking like that to me infront of everyone, and I slapped him (I am not such a person that would do something like that ever, especially infront of that many people) and went to the car. As we got home, he was again so mean and disrespectful to me and he threw my phone into the wall and called me names. Then he cried to my dad that he loved me and wants to build a family with me etc.

When corona started, we haven't seen each other for about three or six months, and when I came to him, he was playing games and I had to wait for him to hug me, and he didn't even flinch. And then his mom came and scolded him why is he playing video games and that he didn't even hug me.

He always got me in the bad mood with saying mean things to me, such as why are you annoying, why are you such a brat, go find a new boyfriend, you are cheating on me anyways, etc.

We never spent quality time together. When I was at his place, we were always at his uncles house or his cousins house and when I said that it bothers me that we don't spend time together, he always said that I don't like his family and he made everything my fault.

The last thing he did, was that a girl sent me a screenshot of him texting her, and when I told him, he denied despite that I had the evidence. Again, at the end it was all my fault.

He always made me feel bad about myself, because everything turned out to be my fault as he said.

And this weekend, I have planned a romantic day for us at my place. I got him a valentines day gift, I bought a bigger blanket because he always said that my blanket is to small, I bought red sheets, all his favorite snacks, drinks, movies, etc. And when he came, he didn't even got me a.flower, and he brought his laptop with him (I must say that we haven't seen each other in 3 weeks). And then he played video games for the whole night on saturday, and on sunday, he was already mad at me because I was annoyed that he brought videogames with him, and he turned everything to me that again everything is my fault. So I didn't do anything for him on valentines day, I just got him a gift and went to bed. We argued and he called me a bitch several times, and he said that I don't deserve anything and that I am the worst girlfriend ever. And that no man would ever want me because I am so annoying all the time and that I don't deserve love and things like that. I also asked him if he could maybe add first letter of my name in his insta bio because I think that is cute and I want that other girls know that he is taken. And of course he got mad and scolded me for being so obsessed with social media.. I was just sad because he is always posting things on his story but he never posted anything about me.

And we broke up. On valentines day.

I must say that I am no perfect girlfriend. But I never called him names, I never cheated nor talked to another man. I always did what he loved doing and also the things I didn't like, I did because of him. He never supported me in any hobby, so at the end, I left everything and I stopped riding horses and doing everything that I love because of him. I always listened to him when we were fighting and I never said anything rude back. I always thought that maybe he would change. I always told every man that texted me, that I am taken and then I blocked them.

Oh and I live on a 'farm', I have three horses. When we were making hay bales, for about 9 times while we were together, he never helped. He never helped me clean stalls, he never helped me with anything. Yesterday, me and my sister were redecorating my wardrobe, and building it, while he was sleeping on my bed. He never did anything,and my family always gave them eggs from our chickens, homemade sausages, our wine, but he never helped with anything. He maybe helped about 5 times tops!

He was actually rude to his sisters and mother too. When they wanted him to do something and he didn't want to, he called them names like bitch, slut, whore, die bitch, fuck off. Etc. They always did things for him, but he didn't do nothing at home. Nothing.

These are the few things that I can remember at the moment, because I try to put bad things behind me, but that is maybe the half of it.

Thank you for reading my story....