I hit the lowest point in my life in 2018, and these past few years have been really rough. It caused problems with my family, with my friends, and within my relationship. I went to therapy for almost a year, read books/articles on recovery, and anytime I’ve had problems with my anxiety/depression I talk to my bf about it and for the most part it helps. It’s getting closer to 3 years since my lowest point and it makes me anxious and mad that my depression has not truly gone away.

Anytime I do something wrong at home or at my job and I get criticized about it, my mind starts to beat me up about it. I’m human and i know I’m going to make mistakes but am I always going to beat myself up about it when I do? Will I always make myself feel worthless because I “can’t do anything right”? This was never me. I was always the happy one, the energetic one, the confident one, and now...I’m scared. I’m nervous of fucking up one day that I’ll go back to that dark place and I don’t want to. It took everything in me to not harm myself to the point of dying and I feel like I’m progressing but then taking 1,000 steps back when I get like this. I don’t know what to do and I don’t wanna feel alone.