Hey ladies!

I’d like to discuss the aftermath of rape & assault with survivors. I was assaulted in 2016 & was going to counseling for a long time at my college. After graduating, it took a lot of time to work up the ability to search for a new therapist and I’m excited to say I have an appointment next week! However, I’ve been wanting to find some sort of support group with similar experiences. I’ve dated since my assault, but I feel like there’s a block or wall between my partner (doesn’t matter who it is) and I. I get through counseling, I understand my depression, PTSD, and anxiety, but I have this other side effects of assault: the second-guessing yourself, the lack of self confidence, avoiding crowds and trying new things, getting into a relaxing. I believe most days I am happy and I no longer feel guilty about talking about it because I know it heals me. The intimacy and sex is hard for me to see, talk about, or do. I usually skip sex scenes on TV and movies and don’t even get me starting on trying to flirt and four play. I see couples in public places and I feel anger and sadness. I also have a 7 month old from a man who I cannot even call a father, so seeing families in public gives me the same feelings. I don’t want this hate to follow me into a healthy relationship with a good man. Does anyone understand and can relate? What techniques helped you push forever and rediscover happiness for yourself.