Ex Wife issues

My current husband and his ex wife have a really good relationship. I had to really get used to it because they are such good friends. She’s also not the friendliest to me and a lot of times I feel she tries to make me jealous. I try to ignore it but of course I have my moments. Well my husband and I had a big falling out because he and his ex still share a bank account together. He’s been dragging his feet on it and doesn’t understand why it’s an issue with me. It’s an issue of respect; a part of me wish I would’ve waited to get married til he had his stuff figured out. I also was really bad and looked at his phone and the messages they send back and forth. He always compliments her in the texts of how proud he is of her and how much he appreciates her. It rubbed me the wrong way. Some of the texting seemed flirty but I didn’t want to assume because it is texting, but a lot of it was not kid related.

Am I wrong for being upset? I just don’t know what to do.