ocd/panic attacks

i really don’t even know how to go about this or even explain it i can over think myself into a panic attack to the point of passing out, i went to therapy when i was 9 and got diagnosed with ocd and ptsd and it was actually driving me insane. i’ve never opened up to anyone about this fully but it’s like i get a feeling that just rush’s over me and makes me totally freak out and i feel like nobody else is like this and it’s really scary. this is kinda my last sense of hope for figuring it out it has gotten better over the years i’m 14 now. when i was 9 i had a episode i cried for weeks, wouldn’t eat, and i felt like i had to tell my mom everything for some reason. i really need a way to cope because i can’t explain it to my friends and i’m actually terrified i’m gonna go back into it.