Tell her that you’ll let her know, so that she’ll quit crying about it and then when you go into labor just “forget” to tell anyone. You know...bc you’re so busy laboring and all that 😂

I told my husband we are not telling anyone when I go into labor because we need to focus on the baby and myself, and don’t need hundreds of people blowing up our phones. Do what’s right for YOU! You are going thru it after all!

Ignore her BS. This is her problem not yours. Your baby requires all your focus and if she can’t deal she’s got bigger issues.

This is my post and I just wanted to say thanks everyone for all of the advice! It’s all really helpful :) my MIL has sent me a big long text saying that she pictured something else for meeting the baby and imagined it differently. She isn’t realIzing how I also pictured a much different birth and pregnancy and life for my first baby too. She is using mostly “I” statements, which infuriates me. It’s not about her and her wishes but she’s making it seem like that’s all that matters. Now my father in law has joined in to the madness so I’ve taken a step back and am gonna let me husband vouch for me on this one. Like a lot of you have said, this is my birth and my baby, so it’s not even really a discussion 😬

I don’t want a ton of people in my business when I’m trying to give birth. But me and my husband do let our parents and siblings know and give periodic updates. They know that info is just for them. I see it as if a family member was taken to the hospital for a health reason, the family has a right to know what’s going on and the state of their health. Your MIL is probably thinking she will be anxious the entire few weeks before the birth for your and the baby’s health. If she knows you are going to tell her when you leave for the hospital, she won’t have to spend that whole time worrying. She’ll only have to worry for a day or so instead of a few weeks. It’s your decision of course. But maybe there is a way to compromise if you tell her it’s only for her info and not to share? Some family members don’t respect the choices of the parent. But if yours will it might be ok and get her off your back.

You guys are so lucky. With my first, mil HAD to drive me to the hospital bc I couldn't get a hold of my husband or my father (who was our support person). I wasn't allowed to drive myself bc I was preclampic. My mom was the only other person I could reach, but she wasn't allowed to drive bc of a recent surgery. So I had to have my mil drive me. I will say, being induced, it was nice to have all the extra support from my mil, fil, my mom, my dad, and of course my hubs. They reach took turns entertaining me through the 34+ hours.

It’s a bit selfish if her to make it about her. This is nit her pregnancy or baby. Boggles my mind how these people have gone through this experience and would likely have felt just like you do if their MIL did this to them. Set the tone now with her because it will only get worse when baby is here. Tell her that you want to include her in this special time but that your main focus is your baby.

My mil was like this she actually gave me the silent treatment and kept her back to me when she met my daughter because we didn’t call her. I think it’s time your hubby talks to her and says he knows she is excited but she needs to take a step back and respect what you want as the mother. We had to have it out with my mil and refused to see her for her to learn her place. Good luck!

Personally, I have never let anyone know when I’m in labor except my mother (who has been my other support person in the room along with my hubby) because, you referenced, for a lot of people, it’s a personal, intimate experience. We don’t let anyone else know until after baby arrives, as we feel like it’s our preference and not someone else’s. If you don’t want her know, you can go with the other commenter’s suggestion of telling her that you will let her know (so she stops stressing you), then conveniently “forget” when you are in labor. 🤗💜

very common problem. is there any way to compromise? my best advice is if you’re ok with it, maybe start A group chat with all the people that you want to know that you were in labor and then you decide when to let them now. That way you’re still telling her but she doesn’t get the opportunity to over intrude